Holiday Spirits

This past weekend, This American Life re-ran their episode with "Santa Fight Club," worth a listen if you don't mind hearing about a rift among professional Santas.

While I'm at it, here's the Tale of Two Macy's Commercials I didn't get a chance to comment on over the holidays. Here's the first:



I think this one's quite cleverly put together. It's a pitch designed to evoke warmth and nostalgia, but if you're a movie/TV buff, it's pretty fun. Now see the second one:



I think this one's pretty bad. On the plus side, they're supporting a good cause in the spot. I'm also not exactly the target audience, since I really only like Carlos Santana of their "celebrities," and couldn't identify all of 'em off the bat. I'm not convinced their celebrity selection is great, though, since the "wide net" approach only works if the audience doesn't dislike other members of the crew (but again, I'm not the target).

The main problem – is there anyone they could have gotten who embodies "the spirit of Christmas" less than Donald Trump? Barring world dictators and violent criminals, that is. He's crass, arrogant, gaudy, ostentatious, and a symbol for self-promotion, commercialism and greed. Plus, his delivery is characteristically wooden. I'm not sure fashion designers are great choices, either, for this spot. At least Santana, Jessica Simpson and Martha Stewart try to give some warmth to their deliveries. But no, I am not buying Christmas as sold by Donald Trump. It's like a vampire showing up to glad-hand at a baptism.

(Cross-posted at Blue Herald)

Ol' Fred's Homespun Pitch

Hey kids, it's rich lobbyist and 'jes folks' character actor Fred Thompson! (He's readin' sumthin', which proves he's smart 'n' stuff, not matter what Nixon said about him). I wonder what he has to say!



Uh, okay. "Responsible" change is the essence of conservatism?!? Obama's really, really liberal? Basically:

If you're nostalgic for Reagan's fake folksy bullshit, and you're fond of Fred's fake folksy bullshit, then you might be just the type who's attracted by Sarah Palin's fake folksy bullshit and McCain's phony populist crap, especially all the fake folksy bullshit he's shilling about his new BFF, Joe the Plumber, who, besides not being a licensed plumber, would - like the vast majority of the country (95% plus) - benefit more under Obama than McCain. But hey, vote the wrong way and those scary furriners might getcha. So vote for McCain.

That is, if you can forget eight years of fake folksy bullshit from George W. Bush.

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

Found on a Right-Wing Blog

No irony at all in this ad, nosirree...

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

Obama Ad on McCain and the Economy

As we've discussed before, an ad being "negative" often isn't a problem - the real issue is whether it's accurate and pertinent or not. An accurate, fair, and relevant "negative" ad gives voters key information, while a deceptive smear does not. I think this one's pretty fair and very much on target.

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

Don LaFontaine (1940-2008)

Don LaFontaine died last week. Even if you didn't know him, you know his voice. And pretty much everyone who's ever made a parody trailer, or riffed on trailer ad copy, has imitated him. Here's some of his work:







I'll also link one of my favorite NPR pieces ever, on political attack ads, a segment LaFontaine would have loved.

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

For Only $2,300, You Can Sponsor a Needy Congressperson

Two things. This is not a parody. And Too Much Information!

Conservatives generally aren't good at comedy, but they often excel at unintentional self-parody. Who exactly is Marilyn Musgrave, you ask? Well, in Rolling Stone's 2006 exposé, "Inside the Worst Congress Ever," Musgrave came in at #10 of their 10 worst congressmen. Here's their profile of "The Christian Soldier":

Musgrave has made regulating the bedroom behavior of her fellow Americans the focus of her entire career. An evangelical Christian who married her Bible-camp sweetheart, Musgrave does not believe in the separation of church and state. She entered politics in 1990, running for her local school board on a crusade to end sex education as part of the curriculum. By the time her tenure was over, the schools taught "abstinence only" -- and offending passages in health textbooks had been blacked out. During her eight years in the Colorado legislature, Musgrave continued her moralizing, overcoming two vetoes by the governor to pass a state ban on gay marriage.

Once in Congress, Musgrave introduced a constitutional amendment to outlaw gay marriage -- which she calls "the most important issue that we face today" -- nearly a year before a Massachusetts court approved civil unions. "She doesn't like the idea of one gay person," says Rep. Barney Frank of Massachusetts. "So obviously the idea of two of us hanging out makes her very unhappy." For her opposition to gay marriage -- as well as her push to legalize concealed weapons -- Musgrave received an endorsement from the KKK in May.

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi doesn't consider Musgrave's move to rewrite the nation's founding document a laughing matter. "She is trying to taint the Constitution," Pelosi says. "That is a violation of the oath of office." But Frank notes one thing he admires about Musgrave: "If you're going to have someone who's a hater, it's best that she's not very bright. I appeared with her in a couple of forums to debate her bill, but she's totally incapable of even explaining what it says."

This video comes via the Wonkette crew, who also provide the following snark:

Congresswoman’s Ad Highlights Childhood As 19th Century British Street Urchin

C’mon people, stop bitching and moaning and threatening to move to socialist Europe under the false assumption that a lame Sarah Palin/Convention bounce has somehow sealed Barack Obama’s terrible fate. Wah wah wah. Things could be so much worse for Barry! Because if John McCain was set on picking a random lady with a narrative, he could’ve gone with Colorado Rep. Marilyn Musgrave instead. Her narrative, as shown in this re-election ad, is far more compelling than Palin’s. Musgrave grew up in Industrial England as a slave hobo, eating Oliver Twist’s leftover porridge and getting beaten up by her drunk father and crying. And then she became a Congresswoman! FOR FIVE AND A HALF YEARS.

Apparently, like the McCain-Palin campaign, Musgrave's going for the pity vote.

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

McCain Ad Parodies

(By the way, there's some profanity in a couple of these, if you're at work or that matters to ya, although I'm guessing - No!)

First up, let's see this effort by Thers, Watertiger and Dan:



What's scary is that there are folks out there who think, "that ad told the truth!"

Then there's McCain and Britney, together again:



And I mean, come on, Britney?!?



The subtext of McCain's actual ad is bad enough, but there are also problems with McCain smearing Paris Hilton when her parents are donors.

This might be my favorite, though (h/t Blue Gal):



That's pretty much all they got. Obama's arrogant, he's popular… plus, he exercises and he's thin. Speaking of thin… (Not that this crap still can't work.)

Bonus: Via BG at C&L, here's the Jesus' General Ghostbusters version of the McCain ads:



(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

Web Ad: Are You Fat?

Are you fat? Who cares? As long as you've got an unrealistic, negative body image, we're happy to take your money! And if you're as massively, repulsively overweight as our model, better hurry! (Don't be scared off by that 'serious inquiry' thing. You're seriously fat. Yikes.)

Better click the ad, and...


Oho! Why do Chinese women stay slim? Hundreds of millions of them, yet they are all slim. I'm guessing the reasons vary quite a bit, but maybe it's any of a number of factors, such as:

a) Genetics
b) Diet
c) Exercise
d) Iron willpower decadent western women don't possess
e) Lack of food due to abject poverty
f) Photoshop

Remember, ladies, given the population of China, one in ten people on the planet is a Chinese woman skinnier than you. Buy our product today!

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

The Suspense is Killing Me

I just saw the ad above on Yahoo TV. Click the picture for a larger view, but the tag says, "Find out Anne's stunning fate in the season finale."

Hmm. Now, granted, Americans don't need to know every detail of British history, and the series The Tudors apparently take great liberties with history. Some readers might not be familiar with the series, which of Henry VIII's wives they're up to, or that the series is about Henry VIII. Granted, although she's the most famous of Henry's wives, they might not divine Anne's last name (although somehow, I don't think they'd mix her up with the other Anne). And maybe they don't have all the billboards for the series we do out here in L.A. and also missed that movie that came out not long ago with Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansson, since apparently quite a few people did.

But heavens, really, what stunning fate could possibly await Anne friggin' Boleyn?

Oh, good, they helpfully supplied a clue:


(Click for a larger view.)

Yeah.

(Cross-posted at The Blue Herald)

Misery?!?

DirecTV has run a number of movie remix ads, some of them quite funny and clever. I found this one rather disturbing. This scene in Misery is one of the most suspenseful, cringe-inducing I can think of. I love both Kathy Bates and black comedy, but at the very least, this is an interesting marketing choice. On the plus side, it's a memorable spot, but on the minus side, it's a negative association with their product (I'd say). Since DirecTV is trying to cover most film genres, I suppose they see this as one of the tamer "horror" clips they can use, although I would have thought their Aliens clip sorta covered that. I'd be interested to know the reactions of other people.

(As to the original scene — it's all the more terrifying because it deals with actual human beings and is possible even if not likely, unlike being attacked by hordes of CG monsters. William Goldman actually fought like hell to keep the scene the same as in Stephen King's book, where it's much more extreme. Goldman felt toning it down would ruin the movie, but he was overruled by director Rob Reiner and others. Goldman later realized, after seeing the finished film, reading reviews and seeing audience reactions, he was wrong. But that's one of many great things about Goldman — he calls it straight from his perspective even if it's impolitic, and will 'fess up to making mistakes. His books on screenwriting are still among the best on both the film industry and the art and craft of writing.)

Bizarre Web Ads

Okay, this first one is not that bizarre... just transparent. Hmmm, what might MSNBC be selling here? This ad was all over the web the past few days. Shame on you, porn makers! Shame on you, insidious porn buyers! And, uh... shame on you, viewer, if you miss our titillating, sensationalist (and likely shallow) coverage!


Nothing promises romantic love like a hydrocephalic blonde chick! Everytime I've seen this fairly common ad, all I can focus on is how, through the magic of Photoshop, this woman's head is abnormally large (most likely transplanted onto someone else's body). I mean, I'm sure she's got a great personality and all, and Match.com's apparent policy of accepting folks of all sorts and sizes is cool, but who the hell thought mutant was sexy?


I have dubbed this the "Rasta Grinch" or the "Rasta Home Mortgage Grinch." While this mortgage company runs some weeeeeeird ads in its attempt to be eye-catching, this is the most bizarre. Bah humbug to Christmas, but smoke it up as we gouge your pocketbook with a horrible refinancing deal! Perhaps that's the message... after you're broke, you won't have any money for presents, so to hell with Christmas and toke up so you don't mind so much.

Or maybe he just caught sight of the neon porn silhouette at MSNBC.